Yes, I turned forty this week and was taken out for dinner twice, a surprise lunch, had a rather large take away, some very tasty chocolate brownies made by Lorna’s lovely daughter and basically did not eat healthily at all. And I’m alright with that. I had a really special birthday week and was made to feel very special by the people I love.
Gary sent me the most beautiful bunch of roses and got me a dress making mannequin which we are picking up on Sunday. Somehow weight has not featured highly on my radar this week. However, I know me well. I know that as soon as I feel I have achieved something (the 20Ib loss) I will almost immediately let up on myself. This can be nicely illustrated by the sheer lack of any type of weight loss since my 20Ib loss. This is normal for me.
One of the reasons I chose to share my start-stop journey of weight loss is that, unlike many, I have NEVER reached my goal weight. Ever. I always except mediocrity from myself in this area and settle with losing some weight rather than continuing on to my goal weight. I said on the first or second week that this time I was not going to give up. I might not lose weight every week, but I will not give up. Having always given up, sometimes with the goal in sight, often not, I want this time to be different. Thing is, if I do what I’ve always done things will be as they always have been.
Right now, I don’t want to put in the hard slog to lose the weight. I’m not talking exercise. Both me and my body love to move. It is good for me, not just in the long-term, but it feels good in the moment. I like to exercise, it is not a hardship to me at all. I don’t like to watch what I eat. This is the slog, not the exercise. This is the point at which I fail. I am overweight, not due to laziness, but due to greed. I eat more than I need.
So how am I going to change this?
The first way is to turn this area over to God. I have fought doing this for so long. I actually don’t want to even think of God and weight loss in the same sentence. I don’t want to feel responsible before the God I adore, and then feel I have let Him down when I inevitably fail. Somehow, having God in the equation means failure isn’t an option; laughing it off isn’t an option; pretending it doesn’t matter isn’t an option. So from this day forth I am going to hand this area over to God and let Him become Lord over every part of my life not just the areas I don’t struggle in. It is a matter of self-control, one of the fruits of the Spirit, who I believe lives in me. God has already done the work, He has gifted me with the tools and His Encourager. I now just have to put in the work. Failure is not an option because God is not in the business of failing those who love Him. Can I please ask something from you? Please could you pray with me and for me, because this is one journey I will not be able to make unless God is by my side.
The second way is to set a goal which is specific, measurable, attainable, relevant and time bound:
This means I am going to share something that few people of the same size would want to. I am going to share my weight. I am going to do this because it is my weight I specifically want to see change. I already eat healthy home cooked meals with lots of fruit and veg, I just eat too much of everything!
I currently weigh 238 Ib (I am 5 feet 8 inches high, and I really am large-boned with feet size of 81/2). My goal weight, for my stature, is a very reasonable 158Ib. However, I have never been below 175Ib (the weight I was when I married) and I have never been below 208Ib since I have had children. At my heaviest, a year after I had the twins, I was 280Ib. My weight is a huge battle for me, and it is not one I have ever won and yet it is one I have battled for forever.
My goal is to lose 10 more pounds to bring my weight loss to 30Ib in total, and I will do it by the 1st of November. I don’t intend to post my weight again until then. I may not even weigh myself until then. I know what I need to do to lose the weight (or in my case what I need to not do). If I am able to control my eating I know I will lose the weight. This gives me just over a month, which is completely doable.
I will still post on a Saturday if I have something to share. Next week I intend to post my monthly update on our financial challenge, so there will be no wibbly wobbly post then.
Over to you. How have you done this week? Are you also setting achievable and specific goals in the weeks to come. Please do share, I would love to pray for you.