How Can It Be?

All our guys are part of a Christian performing arts group called Manna.  Twice a year they put on performances, and scattered throughout the year they perform reach out dances on the streets.  Yesterday, Charlotte was asked to write a rap which she would perform right at the end of one of the dances.  The rap was to be based on the song ‘How Can It Be’ by Lauren Daigle.  She wrote this last night, just before she tucked down.

HOW CAN IT BE?

They say ignorance is bliss,

But why would I want to be ignorant of this?

Why wouldn’t I want to know, that my guilt, my shame

Has been taken, trashed at the sound of His name.

My cornerstone, my hand to hold,

ever constant to young and old.

I used to think that I would never get the Love

That the Bible talked of, from God above.

I had sinned too much, given in too many a time

Become out of balance, lost my rhythm and rhyme.

He held out a hand I was scared to touch,

He said He forgave me, I said I’d done too much,

Turned back to the devil’s arms, the ‘love’ that was tough.

Jesus persisted, said no matter what I’m enough.

I just walked closer towards the ledge,

Followed the devil right to the edge.

Took a step and fell right in

To the pit of memories of all my sin.

The music of angels I had so oft reminisced,

Now, didn’t appear, it’s their sound I missed.

The devil held out a hand, snarled ‘Let’s dance!’

It was then I realised, this was my last chance.

I said, ‘No!’, dragged myself through the mire,

Cried out, repented, was drawn higher,

Until I was there on my knees, crying at His feet,

Knowing I was sinner who would finally meet,

The saviour and Lord who had bore the cross, the pain;

Always working to save me, never thinking of His own gain.

It was on that first day, I thought how can it be?

That He would love a sinner, like me

She read it out to me this morning. How I held myself together I don’t know. Most of my days as mummy I feel like I am scrambling around in the dark. Parenting is the biggest honour of my life. But it is hard. It makes me humble, knowing that no matter what I do, no matter how hard I try or how much effort I put in, no matter how much I think I know or how many books I read, the future is in God’s hands. I am just a vessel. Parenting brings me to my knees.

I then listen to my youngest twin read out a rap that is so personal, with such a deep understanding of what it means to be saved by Jesus. This child of mine, who feels every last feeling to the nth degree and then some; a child, who has not yet quite learnt that her worth isn’t dependent on what others think, but yet fully understands that her real worth is found in Christ. She gets it. And in that moment I know she’ll be alright, this girl of mine, who is not yet comfortable in her own skin, and has no idea of how incredibly precious she is. She will thrive. Because she has a faith in God which will see her through anything life has to throw at her. And for a moment, I am at Peace.