Forgetting about the urgent and concentrating on the important…

It has been no secret that I am struggling for time right now.  Our lives have become a type of busyness that I always promised myself would not be a part of my life.  Yet we have become sucked in somehow.  And I wonder how it got so out of hand.

Nothing we do is ‘bad’ in anyway, but the very energy is being sucked out of us all.  I can see my younger children are not able to keep up the pace which has been set…by someone, but who knows who?  I don’t.  I mention it to Gary.  He agrees.  But what do we do?  What do we cut out?  When everything is full of so much goodness, how do we decide what stays and what goes?

I can see our house becoming more and more of a mess as home-school, drama, friends and general life takes over.  I can see impatience settling in as the teens get used to life’s speed and forget there are other more comfortable paces to live at.  Everything is go, go, go!  The dream of living life at a Northern Irish speed living just outside London is simply not happening.

So today we decided to take an inset day.  Now, I’ve not a clue what an inset day actually is, but when one happens at the nearby schools the children get the day off.  Today, we are not leaving the house.  Today, we are not meeting anyone outside of the family.  Today, we are following our own pace and beating to our own drums.  Thomas is editing skating videos, Lillie is crocheting hair-bands, Charlotte is blogging, A9 is watching nature videos and making notes for her own nature reference book and my littlest is snuggled up in my bed watching a Christmas dvd, without a care in the world.  And me?  Well I am sitting at my computer contemplating which parts of our life we need to say no to and which parts we need to make a priority.  What boundaries do Gary and I need to place around our family?  I am thinking deeply about what is most important to us as a family, before we lose all we have built up over the past decade and a half.  And I am home-making, relishing the dust-free surfaces, enjoying the sparkly clean taps and letting every part of me breath in the Christmas scented candles lit throughout the cottage.

I begin to feel at one with myself once more.  Something needs to change.  Over the next few days we, as a family, will be figuring out what that something is.

 

7 comments

  1. This sums up exactly how I am feeling about our school year this year! We signed up for a few co-ops a class here and there and the next thing I knew it felt like we were ALWAYS going somewhere and yet we enjoy each and every group so much I don’t want to give up any of them… but I think we have to because I just can not keep this pace up. We have Thanksgiving in the U.S. this Thursday and my husband has Friday off as well so we decided to take the rest of the week off, do a few household chores, and try to relax.

  2. I feel like I am in the same place right now. Oddly, my son who is the extrovert in our family is leading the charge to stay home more, do less outside classes and just be. This week we are doing a bit of school, lots of at home games and cleaning and an easy homemade Thanksgiving dinner with store bought pies and rolls (a shock to my kids who are used to me cooking for days around holidays). I just need a break and recapture calmness.
    Blessings, Dawn

  3. We have to push the reset button in our house constantly, too. You mentioned urgent and important and that brings to mind Stephen Covey’s chart of the four quadrants, with urgent and important as the two categories on each side of a square divided in four parts. We are always realigning our life in terms of these quadrants, focusing on “quadrant 2” (not urgent but important) and ignoring or ejecting Q3 And 4 (urgent and unimportant—other peoples problems—and neither urgent nor important —time wasters). Of course we disagree on what goes where, but it does help. Most of all I look at health, happiness and growth as my measuring sticks of success, and try not to get bogged down in minutia. Have a good holiday/ break!

  4. There are many seasons to life and I have found there are more busy and less busy times. I have found it okay to be over busy as long as there is ano endpoint tof it, such as when a play my child is in is over. I have also limited the out of house activities to no more than two, preferably one each. Hope you find your peace.

  5. GOD is going to bring blessing and peace into your lives, for recognizing this important need.
    There is a tendency here in the states for today’s homeschooling moms to get caught up in a whirlwind of activities.
    Their focus is schooling at home, and not the joy and growth of true homeschooling.
    They are so concerned about getting their children involved in multiple activities, and trying to fill every minute of a child’s waking hours; or scholastic achievement that they become oblivious to what the flurry does to the children, the family and their husbands!
    We see the results of this mindset and talk to the children and it saddens us deeply.
    Now that our 5 children are grown, we are so thankful, glad & blessed that we focused on their GOD-Given Individuality and Spiritual health.
    Thank you for your willingness and openness to the every day struggles and joys of the life of homeschooling.

    Psalms 46:10
    Be still and know…….

    Chéryon

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