Just a pondering…

There has been much chat of late in our house about futures and what each child desires for their adulthood.  As parents we have always held that childhood is the time to prepare for being an adult.  It is the reason the children do chores and  have school.  It is the reason we don’t have TV or computer games.  We want the children to use their time profitably, focusing on building skills they might use in their future.

It is once again, a complete privilege  to be a home schooling mummy to these incredible human beings.  I love, love, love that they chat away to me, sharing their dreams and visions for a bright and productive future.  I love that they have ambitions and want them to dream big and free, following God’s lead with the opportunities He places in their path.

T11, as our eldest child, has the most refined and thought-out goals of our eldest children. He is so focused and driven; so hard-working and (most of the time) delights in stretching that brain of his, especially if it has anything to do with science.

He has asked, and we have granted, that he be allowed to take more responsibility for his own education.  Although he still wants to continue studying history with us (afternoons), he has asked that he might organise the rest of his study day himself.  I delight in him asking, in his willingness to have more autonomy.  It does not scare either myself or his father.  He is so ready and  we have absolutely no concerns.

T11 sat on the stairs

Yes, I am very happy to hand the reins of his education over to him.  In reality he has always been a force to be reckoned with and it is this force that drives much of his own learning.  This moment has always been one I have desired for each of my children.  After all, to own their own learning is to own their own future.


  1. I am certain that granting him his desire for more independence and autonomy in pursuing his learning and gathering of knowledge, your young man will flourish and bloom even more… Particularly in self-confidence…that skill so essential in all humans, but particularly in young men. I think you and Gary made a sterling decision!

    1. I agree. We parents have to stand up and treat our boys as men, else how will they ever know the joys of independence, self rule and then ultimately leading their own family. It is the greatest gift we can give them!

  2. I have continued to marvel at your son’s focus and drive- I wish I could channel some of it! His education this year should be very interesting!

    1. Absolutely Ruth. If we can teach them to learn for themselves, we do not then need to worry about what we have or haven’t managed to teach them during their childhood. We can rest in the knowledge we have taught them to teach themselves anything they need to know.

  3. Wow, it’s such a defining moment, especially for a young man. I’m sure T11 will do very well at directing his own learning. I’m very keen to read about how it unfolds.

  4. This is beautiful news…what a giant milestone!

    A question for you…my son is very good at math, and is fir the most part zipping along ahead of schedule in his textbook. I have the goal of independent work, but I can’t help but read the lesson aloud to him “to make sure he got it!”. I know, I am a hoverer.

    Obviously whatever you’ve done has worked and encouraged independence…at what point did you feel comfortable letting him take over?

    1. I understand what you mean. I had to take a deep breath and let go and just trust my son. He was probably about 8 and we had done the first 40 or so lessons of Saxon 5/4 and he turned to me and very sweetly told me that he could probably manage to read the lesson on his own and he really didn’t need me (sniff!).
      The fact is, you are there to answer any problems should he get stuck. That said, I still couldn’t let my girls work independently on maths, they would sit and cry! T11 is a strong maths student, currently working through Saxon 8/7. And he just gets maths.
      If I were you I’d probably ask him if he wants to do it by himself. There would be no point pressing him to be independent if he needs you nearby. No need to rush these things, it will come so long as you both know that is your end goal.
      Hope that rather convoluted reply helps in some way!!

  5. “…to own their own learning is to own their own future.” So true! You must be so happy with how your young man is growing. I hope he will be willing for you to share some of his independent learning adventures.

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