Looking Back Over 2024

This year has been the most unexpected year of my life. Given I gave birth to three babies within the period of 9 months and 2 weeks, I don’t say this lightly! This is going to be a long rambling kind of post, looking back over 2024, which I will try to break up with some family photos along the way 😊

Beginning at the End of 2023

I’m beginning looking back over 2024 by starting where 2023 ended. I had started my own art business, begun a YouTube channel, lost over two stone and having read over 100 books. In addition, I was juggling homeschooling my two younger children, completing the second year of my master’s degree in children and young people and was so close to finishing my Mesopotamia Unit Study. I had rocked 2023! I felt confident making some outrageous New Year’s resolutions with the goal of flying even higher during 2024.

A Very Bad, Not Very Good Start to 2025

This past year began badly as I had some sort of allergic reaction to a flu virus (who knew this was even possible?). I was spotty over the entirety of my body and so very very itchy. The itchiness very quickly turned to pain and itch in equal measure. If I scratched, the pain got worse. If I didn’t, the itching increased. I was put on antihistamine, steroids, antibiotics… let’s just say, it was an inauspicious start to the year. Unfortunately, things were not going to improve.

Insomnia, Insomnia and More Insomnia

If you have been reading my blog for any length of time, you will know that I have insomnia. I have had this my entire life (which apparently is very unusual) and up until the age of forty, I slept around ten hours each week. I coped pretty well up ’til then because frankly it was all I knew, I had never slept more and so just got on with life. Reaching forty was a turning point for me. I felt exhausted all of the time and this exhaustion was starting to affect my life as a homeschooling mum. I went to the doctor’s and, for the first time in my entire life, I was asked to describe the insomnia.

Looking Back Over 2024 I Realised my Insomnia had Returned…

If you’ve watched my introductory video on YouTube, you’ll know that my head feels like a mix between a rave and a spaghetti junction! My doctor said she knew what was wrong and gave me a medicine which decreases the excessive firing of neurones in my brain. Now, over the years (around exam times, usually) I have tried every sleeping pill going, but none have ever had any effect. But this medicine worked like a dream. Finally, I was sleeping about four or five hours a night (and yes, I know not brilliant, but for me miraculous and much better than 1-2).

Fast forward to 2023, and I had moved to a new GP who didn’t want to prescribe the medicine and felt I should have been sent to a sleep clinic first. So she referred me. Sigh. My sleep took a nose dive which has never really recovered. I guess the one good thing which came from the sleep clinic was the assertion that I probably had a neurodivergency. I completed the questionnaire for ADHD and autism, scoring low for ADHD and 9/10 for autism. Suddenly, SO much of my life and particularly my childhood made sense. The GP has referred me for testing although there is a waiting list of five years for adult autism referrals where I live.

I write all of this because these two things set the tone for the following 12 months. I’m now going to list all the things this year which have been tricky and they give you an idea of how unexpected this year has been.

My Unexpected Year

Ill Health Seems to Surround Us Right Now

Me

So…my year began with painful itching and no sleep and whilst the itching cleared up, the sleep really never recovered, even with the medicine, which my GP reluctantly continued to prescribe.

Charlotte

And then Charlotte’s health took a nosedive. Charlotte blows my mind every single day. She lives with debilitating chronic illnesses and yet lives an incredibly full and happy life. She manages most of her conditions really well, has an amazing husband and an equally amazing boss, both of whom make sure she is well looked after. But this year she experienced an acute and nasty case of cellulitis in one side of her face which caused her excruciating pain and landed her in hospital.

Gary

Gary injured his shoulder. Now if I tell you that when his appendix burst, he told the doctor his pain level was 4/10, you will realise what a high pain threshold he naturally has. This was different. His shoulder was so bad he wasn’t able to sleep, wasn’t able to work (he still went to work, but wasn’t able to do anything which required the use of his arm or shoulder) and couldn’t lead worship anymore because playing the guitar made it particularly bad. We bought everything we could think of to try to improve it and eventually it started to get better.

Lillie

Lillie split up with her long-term boyfriend. Whilst this was devastating at the time for her, it has actually turned into a complete blessing. She has blossomed and is so much happier. Of course one’s first split is always the most painful one. There were many, many tears but, in the days that followed, she held herself to a really high standard and refused to say a negative word about him, even though he had behaved really poorly. The whole experience has given her a much clearer picture of the type of man she wants in her future, and I don’t see her settling for less.

Charlotte (Again)

Charlotte was diagnosed with autism, OCD and Tourette’s. None of these were surprise diagnoses but the OCD was interesting. We already knew she had a thing for the number three because when her tiks were at their worst, they came in threes, then three times three… What is interesting is that her first ever seizure started at three in the morning. The brain is a remarkable thing. These three conditions often go hand in hand, and whilst there is no specific ‘cure’ for any of them, it has helped Charlotte understand herself better. The psychiatrist believes that all of her conditions (which are neurological in origin) stem from her birth.

Lil’s placenta pulled out Charlotte’s and whilst I almost bled to death, Charlotte went with less than optimal oxygen for the twenty minutes it took to stabilise me and get her out. He thinks that the changes physiologically which occurred during puberty at around aged 13 switched on many of these conditions, which is why we began seeing the symptoms beginning around then. Covid exacerbated things as she was not able to get any medical help during the lockdowns, which brings us to where we are today.

My Mum 😢

My gorgeous mum, who we live next door to, lost her beloved cat which broke her heart. She also had two really nasty falls. And in September was diagnosed with metastatic squamous cell carcinoma. Whilst it has spread to her lymph nodes, they are unable to find the primary tumour despite carrying out every scan, scope and procedure known to man. This has delayed her treatment, and almost four months later, she still has yet to be given any kind of treatment or even a treatment plan. It is all very concerning.

Abigail

Abigail attends army cadets, which she loves. However, she is one of the oldest there and for a long time was one of the only girls there. Although things have improved somewhat in the last few months, she felt very lonely there and was often left on her own on the sidelines. I am so proud of her for continuing to go regardless of how unconfident going made her feel. However, the consequence of this has been the beginning of some anxiety.

This is surprising because Abs is the most laid back, happy, helpful young lady. At 16, we thought perhaps she had manage to avoid the whole awkward teen stage. Over the last few months we have noticed that there have been a few more tears and the rumblings of some anxiety.

Having dealt with anxiety with Charlotte, and, to a lesser and shorter extent, Thomas, I sought help immediately. She was referred for CBT over the summer, but unfortunately the NHS is not as it used to be and we have not heard anything since. Charlotte and Thomas have been amazing, helping her to learn new coping skills to prevent the anxiety spiralling. And as every challenge seems to do in our family, it has brought us even closer together.

Looking Back Over 2024 and Year Two of Master’s

I managed to pass this year of my master’s degree in childhood and youth studies. In my first year, I got a distinction with an overall grade of 93%. This blew me away! I had no clue I could achieve such a high grade. During this second year, I have struggled because it was a module all about clinical practice of which I’ve never had.

I honestly found it difficult and a bit uninteresting and right from the start I knew I would not be achieving such a high grade. However, I managed to get an overall score of 68% which is a pass and I have to admit to being very pleased to have that module behind me. I have chosen to take this year out because I wanted to be around to help mum if/when she needed me. I have one more module to complete which is a research project of my own choosing. But that will have to wait for now.

Having just read over everything looking back over 2024 that I’ve written, I realise how stressful this year might sound. At times it has been tricky. There have been many, many tears shed this year, but I always hold on to the fact that God never sends anything back empty.

God Never Sends Back Anything Back Empty

Every experience grows us each year for what is to come.

God knows what He is doing and all things happen for the good of those who love Him. Gary and I have dealt with so much pain over the past almost 30 years but we have also dealt with the most extreme and intense happiness. I do not think we could have had one without the other. It is the dips which make the peaks so much more satisfying. I honestly wouldn’t change a thing. Even Charlotte’s health. I always thought if only I could take away her pain, I would happily take it on myself. I know Gary felt this way also.

And yet…God.

Looking Back Over 2024 and Focusing on the Positives

Charlotte

Charlotte has developed and grown so much through her health struggles. She is not the woman she was. She is stronger and has learnt the lessons only someone who has experienced devastation in any form can learn. And she is content in all things. THIS is the biggest blessing. To be happy and joyful regardless of the storm which rages around you. THIS. God knows that it is only the strong winds which give saplings the strength to become huge oak trees. He has a purpose for all suffering.

Lillie

Lillie is the same. The woman who has emerged from the bullying at her first university, the decade of watching her twin suffer and the discovery that the man she loved was not the man he portrayed himself to be…that woman is STRONG. That woman is well able to stick up for herself and not back down even when faced by giants. She has developed into a woman who knows her own mind, who believes in herself and her dreams and who is determined to do whatever it takes to be a woman she is proud of.

I am not scared of the future. I know, with a bone-deep confidence, that no matter what life throws at us individually or collectively, we can stand firm in God’s love. It is not a love that shelters us from harm, but instead is a love that walks alongside each one of us. We may travel through the valley of death but we do not travel alone and we do not have any reason to fear.

Looking Back Over 2024…Claire

All this to say, this year did not turn out at all like I expected it to. It was absolutely not a continuation of the success of the previous year. Certainly in terms of health and fitness, reading books and my master’s degree, I achieved very little. I kept off the weight-loss of 2023 (something I am absurdly proud of). I read practically no books outside of the reading required for my degree. And I got a measly 68% for my master’s. If I left off here I think I would be giving you an inaccurate perception of my own thoughts about this year….because there have been little gems which maybe weren’t on my goal list but nevertheless should be included on my achievements list.

Angelicscalliwags Website

I have been blogging since 2012. My blog has never been huge but I’ve always had a nice fairly stable number of people visiting over the course of each year. Whilst the number of views I get each year tend to go up and down sometimes reaching the 100,000 mark (!), I have noticed that this year I have had my third highest number of visitors…almost 50,000 people have visited my blog this year viewing over 70,000 blog posts between them. This is a surprise to me on two accounts.

The first is that a while ago I changed the setting so that each post in its entirety gets sent out to each of my almost 700 email subscribers, so those who read the email are not included in those stats.

Secondly, compared to the two other years I have had more visitors than this, I have not written as many posts this year. For example, in 2014 I wrote 224 blog posts and in 2015 I wrote 254. It is during these years that over 50,000 people visited my blog each year. In comparison, this year I wrote only 37 (!) blog posts. So far fewer. Of course, the posts I have written in previous years are there on my blog and it is these older posts which seem to attract the most attention.

But, y’know what, I’m taking that as a very small win this year.

YouTube Channel AngelicscalliwagsArt

I also managed to post fairly regularly to my art YouTube channel. I really love making videos and whilst I’m still a bit woeful at them, I think they are improving a little. Over the last year I have posted 43 videos, close to one per week. In fact, apart from around August and September when I had three assignments to write for my master’s, I have managed weekly videos consistently. I feel completely honoured that over 800 people have chosen to follow me on YouTube and I love the tiny community which is beginning to form.

Angelicscalliwags Newsletter

I have begun a newsletter. This statement isn’t fully accurate because whilst I have begun collecting newsletter subscribers, I have not been very regular in terms of writing a newsletter. Somehow, I have manage to attract 157 subscribers (thank you all so, so much!). I want to start writing newsletters a bit more regularly rather than sporadically. But I began it and I’ll take that as a small win this year.

Ads and Charlotte

Ads and Charlotte are moving out next week to start their own lives together as a married couple away from us. I feel very Peaceful about this. It is the right time. She is ready, and so is he. There are many plans afoot regarding the bedroom they will be leaving behind and I’m sure our little cottage will give a little sigh of relief as stuff is moved out and we become a little less cluttered (our cottage is quirky and small and not really made for 7 plus people!).

Wrapping Up Looking Back Over 2024

So to wrap up looking back over 2024…this year has been unexpected. There are many things I could easily wish hadn’t happened. But at 50, I understand more fully than ever, that challenges grow us individually and together as a family.

I hope you have all had a wonderful year to reflect back on, and a blessed year ahead. See you in 2025!