Happy 15th Birthday Abigail

Happy birthday my darling girl! I can not believe it’s been 15 years since you were born. You’ve heard the story of your birth so many times. For me, though, I can not tell it enough. You were born after the twins horrific birth when I nearly died. With no recordable blood pressure and no pulse, the (many) doctors present at Lillie and Charlotte’s birth could not believe I survived. Their birth traumatised me so much that it took me years to get over it. When Gary and I decided to have more children and I felt ready to go through the birth again, I ended up having three miscarriages, one of which landed me in hospital. It was these events which framed my pregnancy and birth with you.

God knew what I needed though. With pre-eclampsia threatening for the second time, the doctors decided to do a caesarian. At the time, I was distraught. Charlotte had needed to be cut out of me to save my (and her) life. I so wanted a large family and knew three caesarians would probably be the maximum the doctors would do, limiting the size of family I could have.

This was the backdrop to your birth.

I was terrified to be giving birth and deeply disappointed to not be having a natural birth. And yet, your birth was by far my most favourite and so relaxed it gave us a hint as to the type of person you would grow into. At the birth I had an older trainee doctor sitting at my head, stroking my hair, painstakingly explaining to me everything the doctor was doing at the other end. When he brought you out, it was with the sac still surrounding you and in tact. There you were, with a shock of red (yes red!) hair, your face pressed against the translucent sac, vibrant blue eyes staring through at me.

Our eyes met and in that moment I knew everything was going to be okay.

Apart from a fairly severe dairy allergy, which affected the first couple of weeks of your life, as you were completely unable to digest any milk I gave you, you were the most laidback baby. And now at fifteen nothing much has changed.

Our family needed an Abigail. Where most of your siblings are a loud, boisterous and drama filled lot, you are the calm within the storm. Even your teen years have been markedly different because of the sensible, down-to-earth perspective you take on life.

You are always yourself. You never change to be anyone other than Abigail, even when it may have been easier to do so. You have a deep sense of who you are and who you want to become. Above all else you are the kindest and most loyal person I have ever known. I have never heard you join in gossip or talk negatively about anyone…yet you also never make anyone else feel guilty for doing so.

If asked, you happily talk about the importance of your faith and how that steers the decision you make about how you live…and you manage to do so without the slightest hint of being judgemental or having an ulterior motive. You don’t just love yourself for exactly who you are, you also always love others for being exactly who they are.

Other people and their comfort is always more important to you than your own. You tend to notice things that others don’t, and then try to make things better if you can. You work at the things you enjoy tirelessly and have a huge sense of responsibility, never wanting to let anyone down. Even if things are hard, you don’t shy away. Tenacious to the core, you keep showing up and doing the hard thing, until it becomes easier. It is always you who offers to help, who quietly gets on with chores and never ever makes a fuss about anything.

Sweetheart, dad and I notice it all, and are so proud of you and woman you are becoming.

To us, you are incredible and we love you so very much.